Conundrums

By now I was working in Birmingham's biggest library working full time and had recently become a single mom. Although so far, this blog is full of cute little antidotes things were soon to change and for good. Not only was i working full time but I had two wee children who were going to need a lot of help from their mom.

Caragh was seeing a psych nurse at Cams, we tried helping her with her "boundary problems", as soon as she saw the male nurse, she would jump on his lap and smile sweetly. We would do scenarios asking what she would do if someone in a car offered her sweets? She always replied "thank you" and took the imaginary sweets. I tried for over a year to get her to say no to the naughty stranger but it never worked.

Although I had been told Shannon was fine, at age three she was already colouring in perfectly:  there was not a tiny bit of the colour outside the lines. She also amazed me with her jigsaws, she would spend hours putting all the little pieces together, and they were all finished to perfection. This did seem unusual to me but what did i know? All kids were different were they not?

Different worlds

They say you never get two the same and that was so true with my two. Shannon was shy, hated being touched and liked her own company. They were soon to drive me insane with their constant "she did it" in unison when ever i asked who had committed the latest crime, e.g. broke my favourite bone china cup, or something small like the computer.

By the time Caragh was five i felt there was something unusual shall we say about her responses to situations when she hurt herself on the sofa she said "mommy the sofa bumped into me, naughty sofa" Then smacked the settee. Something didn't seem as it should be. Shannon had been slow to walk and at three still didn't like being touched.

I explained my concerns to the doctor who referred Caragh and Shannon to the CAMS team. They gave Shannon a clean bill of mental health, but Caragh apparently had boundary problems, still no mention of anything on the spectrum...

Aspergers my journey

By the age of two Caragh could say the alphabet unaided,  and i was told she was super bright, super! When Caragh was three along came Shannon her bonny sister, to my relief she slept astonishingly well was a very quiet sweet child that smiled a lot. I had two perfectly normal girls one loud and out going and one quite and sensitive. Life was good.

Here is a story for you which makes me laugh even now, although funny it was my first hint of something not quite right. Caragh and me were in the garden playing witches we used to have such fun times playing. I was the witch the nasty cackling witch chasing her in the garden squealing and giggling she was running from me, she slipped on the floor grazing her face poor thing.

The next day we were at the hair dressers getting ready for my sisters wedding. Caragh was first up, the hair dresser says "oh dear what did you do to your face" which Caragh replied "mommy did it" The look on the hairdressers face was so funny she didnt know what to say, i told Caragh to tell the truth and say what happened she just said "you did it mommy you cut my face"

Of course she's right i did do it by chasing her, but honestly she slipped, she was being literal.

My children's Aspergers journey

Oh boy where do i begin? A mother with the most amazing daughters. this blog is to share my journey of having children with special needs this is not a professionals point of view this is my point of view and shall write it as I see it.

My daughters are now 21 and 19 but i will start at the beginning.

I had no idea of special needs when my daughter Caragh was born to me she was a cute sweet baby that liked to cry a lot. She was happy when i held her but cried when on her own. As she grew i noticed she hated touching socks or chalk. and instead of her playing with toys she would love, love, love, to play with a big bowl full of uncooked rice running her fingers through it for ages.